It's funny how a long retentive, blossomed and full fledged friendship ceases so effortlessly.
Can you ever expect to have given your precious time, smiles, fights, tears to someone who would walk out of your life not because something happened between you two but because he is constantly baited by people , who happened to be your friends too, regarding the company he keeps. People come and they go but is it easy to accept someone's departure for the same blame for which that person stood by you many a times ..?
He was constanly warned and adviced to stay away from you. But he decided to stay bcause he saw the real "you". Out of all, he knew that you are different but not worth being hated. He took your side everytime a finger was raised on you. Since it's been many a times that he has stood up, you overlooked those few times when he kept mum while others sprouted the words of hatred. It went too well and maybe this is where the problem began. Maybe it went just too well, more than it should have been. Because the day finally came when that person decided to tell you that he no longer need you in life and that was because he was supposed to choose between you and his partner. And it's obvious who his choice would be. Somehow it did not hurt you much because you knew deep down in your heart that this day would come. You know you don't deserve to be loved and whosoever for once loves you will ultimately abandon you happily - because it has happened SEVERAL times. And o'course in your utter foolishness you forgot about this and the question which you always overlooked, now flashes back.
"So there's definitely something wrong with me that EVERYONE hates me. What is the reason..?"
You were a protagnist for being hated, even among friends, esp by friends. This question was pondered upon innumerable times but his presence always made you overlook it because you knew that if out of these many, he stood for you, there has to be something, if not everything, right in what you had done.
But now that your support is lost, for the same reason, wouldn't it be wiser to accept the fact that you are meant to be hated..? Rather than trying to find reasons to prove something opposite to the existing truth, it's smarter to accept and learn to live with it.
It's been high time now. You have had many punches right in face, but your huge self esteem overleaped your vision to see what they really were for. They were not to tell you that those people are not good enough to love you but to tell you that its YOU who doesnt deserve to be loved. And since you figure it now, wouldn't it be nice if you start mending your ways from this very moment..?
You will continue to get comments that this is not true, you are an amazing person and only to be loved and whosoever hates you, is a jerk. But remember, the person who just walked out on you said the same things once.
You figured so many things and now you are smart enough to know what is there for you to learn from this punch.
Hope you learn to accept the truth and find peace in it.
God Bless
